Lessons I Learned From My Best Friend 1

Lesson One: Companiable Silence or “Shut Up. I’m Trying To Watch The Show”
(A rerun. Brought to you courtesy of Antfood)

We’re watching yet another thrilling X-Files Season Two rerun about Mulder and Scully getting abducted/ kidnapped/ contacted by aliens/ caught in a bright paranormal light or generally yelling each others names into the night. Yes- I’m talking about th’ overused, flogged-to-death “MULDER!/ SCULLY!” scene. Oh, let’s not forget Scully’s favorite phrase: “Oh-My-God.” But I digress. The screen shows a spooky night scene (are there any other kinds?) accompanied by Mark Snow’s equally spooky music composition. Suddenly, a bright white light flashes and Scully is missing.
(Let’s say it all together now) “Scully!!” Mulder yells frantically, falling to his knees. A split second later, an irritating advertisement jingle blares to my annoyance.

{aggravating music plays}

DeepBassNarratorGuy: Now, introducing the all new ABC kitchen utensil! It’s a peeler, knife, measuring cup, ladle and frying pan all in one implement!

{Ladies crowd half-heartedly around the miracle tool}

HouseLadies: Wow! {with fixed smiles on their faces which looks more like a death grimace }

DBNG: YES! Wow, indeed. ABC- The Kitchen YOU-tensil Made Specially For You!!

{soundBITE ends, thankfully}

I laugh and flip on the news- I can still hear yet another inane soundbite through th’ phone on Red’s TV. Red will never switch channels until her precious X-Files is over. It’s a sickness I tell you. Walking over to th’ kitchen with my cordless phone tucked under my chin, I root around for snacks. Red has a phone in her living room, I think. No doubt, she’ll be rooted to the spot for another 40 minutes- phone cradled on her shoulder, eyes intently glued to th’ tube.
I made it just in time for a short replay of the last scene- Mulder in all his angsty glory shouting into the night. I snorted inappropriately.
“What are you laughing at?” Red asks.
Yeah, whoops. “Nothing.”
“Whaaat?!?” she growls irritatedly.
I grin, “If I had a dollar for every time Mulder yells Scully’s name like that, I’d be rich.”
Silence. I can hear Red sigh imperceptibly. It’s true, but she doesn’t like to admit it.
Another quiet moment passes, then a soft “Shut up. I’m tryin’ to watch th’ show,” she mutters.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
That’s how it us for us. We watch TV and do things together through th’ phone. If I’m bored whilst skinning chicken or cooking, I’d call her with absolutely nothing to say. At least there’s someone else getting bored with me. Our phone conversations are always punctuated with long periods of silence. It’s in those times I revel in the closeness of our purported ‘bond’ and wonder who the hell is paying for the call.

It’s no fun watching a movie alone, so having a quiet friend along is a real boon. Unfortunately, though we have long intervals of silence, Red is far from being a quiet person. We’re th’ inconsiderate buggers in your movie theatre who talks to the screen and occasionally shouts choice epithets at lousy actors. Maybe it’s a good thing that th’ only two movies we’ve watched together is ‘Stuart Little’ and ‘Mousehunt’ (do you see a trend?)

I believe a friend may be present but not necessarily heard. When I’m working, Red sits in th’ store for hours- just reading a book (and leeching off my free employee beverages). If I’ve got stuff to do on the computer, friends present will do something else. I can hand over my house keys to Marque (a friend) and she’ll just let herself in for a nap when I have something to do.

Companiable silence, gentle readers, its someting rare. Cherish it if you have it.